How do I get tickets?

I would like to attend a play party - how do I interview?

What is P3Gateway?

Do you have a mailing address?

Is P3Gatherings a membership-based group? What are the dues?

What is a workshop? - What should I wear? Who attends? What is the protocol? Why should I go? What time do workshops start? Who teaches? Can I teach too?

Can you hold a ticket for me until the day of the workshop/party?

Do you sell tickets at the door?

I would like to attend but can not afford to.

What is P3Gathering's History?


What is a munch? - What should I wear? Who attends? What is the protocol? Why should I go?
What is a play party? - What should I bring? What should I wear? Who attends? What are the protocols? How do I get invited?
What toys do I need or should I have?
How do I meet a Master/Mistress/Dominant/Top?
How do I meet a submissive/slave/bottom?
Vanilla? Submissive? Dominant? What do all of these terms mean?

Still can't find your question? Click here!

How do I get tickets?


2010 update: We currently are only selling tickets at the door. If you would like to attend a particular workshop, please email us.

We have several ways for you to get tickets.

1) Paypal – email us for availability and information about how to process paypal payments. Paypal accounts take approx. 3 days to set up if you don’t already have an account. There is a small surcharge for paypal tickets to cover what paypal charges us. Please do not send us money through paypal without first assuring that tickets are available to you. Include in your paypal notes the names and email addresses of everyone you're purchasing a ticket for, and which tickets you're purchasing.

2) In person – we attend a number of events in Calgary (as well as occasionally Edmonton, Lethbridge and others) and can make arrangements to sell tickets in person. Most commonly you can find us at the Monday Night Munch. Please check our calendar for the address, etc. We also sell tickets at the twice-yearly Calgary Kinky Flea Market.

3) By Snail Mail – you can send us a cheque through snail mail. Please remember it takes up to 10 business days for mail to arrive, and let us know when you are sending your cheque to ensure that we have tickets remaining, and so we ensure to check our mail box. (It does not get checked daily.)

4) At the door – our weeknight 101 workshops do allow remaining ticket sales at the door. If you want to be assured admittance - please pre-purchase your tickets. In order to get the address for our location you must email us to be added to our guest list. The address is not publicly available. We will not sell party tickets at the door.

Please remember that workshop tickets are available to anyone who wishes to attend, however only those guests who have interviewed successfully will be invited to attend our Private BDSM Play Party. If you provide funds for a party ticket and you are not an interviewed guest, your ticket will be denied.

Unfortunately we are unable to accept post-dated cheques.

For large events (multiple day events) we MUST receive personal cheques three weeks in advance of the event day to allow the cheque to clear before the event. We will not accept cheques for any event (large or small) in excess of 100$ without 3 weeks notice before an event. Unfortunately we have had to adopt this policy due to a number of NSF cheques that we have received. If an individual has two NSF cheques with us, or is unable to resolve a first NSF cheque with us in a timely manner, we will no longer accept personal cheques from that individual.


I would like to attend a play party - how do I interview?

2010 update: We currently are not planning any parties for 2010.

If you haven't yet attended one of our private BDSM play parties, you will need to interview. Please see our "Parties" page for more information as to why we conduct interviews.

1) Please read our website before requesting an interview. It will clear up many questions you might have. In particular, please read the Party, Party FAQ, and FAQ (this one right here!) pages.

2) Please email us at our Gmail address to set up a time and location for your interview.
-- we previously conducted our interviews primarily at the Monday Night Munches. Due to the overwhelming success of this munch, we no longer have the space to do this. Please email us with your interview request and we will find a mutually favorable opportunity to do so.
-- most of our interviews "close" two weeks before our party - this allows us time to confirm references, etc... If you wait too long to request your interview, we will not be able to accommodate you.

3) We can do long-distance interviews for individuals who live outside of Calgary. We do require established references for long-distance interviews. Dont worry, our organizers know people who are active in many different communities outside of Calgary.

4) We also host a regular "P3Gatherings Gateway" meeting - which is a group interview. This not only saves our organizers time, being able to interview many people in one night together, but is also a great chance for our new guests to meet OTHER new guests - and know that you're not the only one who is new to our group. More about P3Gateway below.

What is P3Gateway?

2010 update: As we are not hosting any play parties, we are not hosting any Gateway meetings for 2010.

P3Gatherings hosts a (currently irregular) meeting called P3Gateway. Gateway is based very loosely on the Gateway group that meets at the Denver Sanctuary. Gateway is basically a group interview for our private BDSM play parties. At Gateway we will start with sharing a bit about our group, our workshops, our parties, and our rules. You'll have the opportunity to ask any questions you might have. Then we'll break up to do the private part of our interview where we can get to know you a bit, and you can ask any personal questions you might have.

Gateway is NOT a munch - however attendees will have the chance to meet other new guests (which is great to help alleviate any worries about cliques... since everyone there is in the same position you are!) and socialize.

We ask that anyone attending Gateway:
1) Come with the intention of learning about our group and interviewing.
2) Read our website (in particular the Party, Party FAQ, and FAQ (this one right here!) pages before attending.
3) Support the venue - this means having a bite to eat, a drink, even just a coffee.
4) Be discreet. This means casual clothing, not wearing obvious fetish items (heavy collars, floggers, etc) and keeping conversations 'vanilla' when servers or other patrons are within earshot.

Do you have a mailing address?

If you are already on our party guest list, or want workshop tickets, you can also get tickets via our postal address. Send a cheque made out to our Treasurer "Derek" to:

Box 35013
4604 37th Street S.W.
Calgary, Alberta
T3E 3C0

And include a list of what tickets you would like, along with a contact email address for each guest.


Is P3Gatherings a membership-based group? What are the dues?

No – P3Gatherings is presently NOT a membership based group. There are no monthly/yearly dues. You simply pay to attend what YOU want to attend. Funds raised through ticket sales go towards paying for the costs of putting on our events. We have a mailing list – people who receive advertising emails about our events & a guest list – those who have purchased tickets and will be attending an event.

What is a workshop? - What should I wear? Who attends? What is the protocol? Why should I go? What time do workshops start? Who teaches? Can I teach too?

P3Gatherings workshops are basically classes (or sometimes lectures, demos, etc) where members of our community share their skill, knowledge, and / or experience with others in our community. Workshops don’t replace mentorship, hands-on learning, or other forms of education – but they are an option to round out your education.

Workshops are often held in semi-private or private locations, during the day or evening. You will be most comfortable wearing casual, comfortable clothing vs. fetish wear. For some workshops there might be special requests in attire for safety reasons or to facilitate interactivity. When workshops are held in shared spaces it is important to avoid disturbing others so we ask our guests to avoid fetish wear, obvious collars, etc.. and ask them to carry any tools or toys in closed containers/bags. Be respectful.

All sorts of different people attend workshops. Tops, bottoms, switches, dominants, submissives... people who are new to the lifestyle, people introducing vanilla partners to the lifestyle, and people who have been in the lifestyle for years and years. Many people who attend are single, many are coupled. While some workshops are specifically geared to one group, anyone may attend unless otherwise instructed.

Workshops are generally low-key, kink friendly functions, with very little formal protocol. The most important protocols are generally just to be respectful – respectful of the persons, property, time, skill, and opinions of those around you – the organizers, the teachers, and your fellow students. Attend with an open mind towards learning something, clean up after yourself, arrive on time, and be polite.

You should attend workshops if you are looking to learn more about the lifestyle, skill sets, or other topics that arise. You should attend workshops to meet other people interested in similar topics, and to meet the instructors who may be available for future more in-depth learning. Workshops also have a very structured social element as well, and many people find that it is easier to meet new people at a workshop because there is a built-in topic of conversation. Many people just like the social element of a workshop and being able to engage more fully in the lifestyle in general. Workshops are a great way to see potential partners in action, have the chance to volunteer to experience the sensations, as well as to learn more about the skill to know if your future partners are doing things safely.

If you are interested in teaching for P3Gatherings, please visit “Why Teach?"

Can you hold a ticket for me until the day of the workshop/party?

No.
In the past we would hold tickets for those who said they were coming, while accumulating a waiting list for those who also wanted to attend, but were 'too slow' in getting their tickets. When our "holds" didn't show up, or cancelled at the last minute, it was too late to contact our waiting list to open up those tickets. This has three problems.
1) People were disappointed, needlessly.
2) Because we operate on a cost-recovery basis and without filling all the seats we need to fill - we can't afford to continue with our low prices.
3) We purchase food, drink, supplies, etc for our parties/workshops based on the number of people expected to attend. We don't want to waste goods.

Because we advertise our events at least a month BEFORE the event, we believe this is ample time to purchase a ticket.

Do you sell tickets at the door?

2010 update: We currently are only selling tickets at the door. If you would like to attend a particular workshop, please email us.

Yes and No.
In 2008 we started a alternate month workshop-only event. This event will allow ticket sales at the door, though we still prefer to sell them before hand for more accurate planning.

For our weekend workshops we will not usually allow ticket sales at the door due to the nature of the workshops.

We NEVER sell tickets at the door for our play party. This is for our mutual protection and privacy.

I would like to attend but can not afford to.

It is understandable that from time to time finances are too tight to enjoy workshops, social opportunities, etc. It is our mandate to provide education to our community and we do offer "scholarships" to worthy 'students' who are dedicated to education but who fall upon "hard times" and can not afford to attend our workshops. Each case is assessed on a case-by-case basis, however we give preference to individuals who have attended workshops before, and are willing to volunteer to set up/tear down to assist us along with our other volunteers. Scholarships may not be available for all workshops or events.
If you are experiencing financial difficulties and would like to apply for a "scholarship" - please speak to one of our organizers as soon as possible with regards to the workshop you would like to attend. Once a workshop is sold out, there are no more spaces available.

What is P3Gathering's History?

P3Gatherings was started in May 2005 by Mike, Deborah, and Dawn. The group was formed with the assistance of Cookie and Kelly, with a mandate offering workshops and private play parties. The workshops were a continuation of the work done by Cookie and Cookie's Kinky Creations - and we continued with her mandate of ensureing that workshops were available to anyone who wanted to learn, and providing a venue for anyone who wanted to teach. Our Private Play Parties were, at the time, the only regular Play Parties going on in the Calgary area that were known to the community at large. (Versus private home parties.)
In April 2006 Deborah stepped down as an organizer of P3Gatherings and was replaced by Dennis & Derek.
In December 2006 Mike stepped down as an organizer of P3Gatherings.
In June 2007 Dawn retired as an organizer and took up the role of advisor.
In January 2008 Dawn returned as an organizer while Dennis focused more on our parties.
In June 2008 Dennis was no longer involved with the group and Jenn stepped up as an organizer.
In Fall 2008 Vad joined P3Gatherings as an assistant.
In 2009 Vad became an official organizer.



What is a munch? - What should I wear? Who attends? What is the protocol? Why should I go?

A munch is a casual social gathering for kinky people. It is usually held in an vanilla (non-kinky) environment like a pub or restaurant. Occasionally they are held in kink-friendly environments like gay bars.

You should wear whatever you feel comfortable in for that environment. A munch is not a fetish night, so keep the fetish wear at home. Jeans and a t-shirt is fine, though dressing neat, tidy, and clean is more important.

Different people attend different kinds of munches. Usually the people who attend will break off into small groups of friends. Some munches tend to be small and intimate, others tend to be large and sprawling. Do not be offended if people seem deeply involved in their conversations and don't jump up to talk to you.

There is very little protocol for a munch. However, it is appreciated if you:

You should go to munches in order to find out about events happening in town, to meet new people, to build friendships and relationships with people who attend. It is also a good way of figuring out who is a well respected member of the community, and who isn't, get real references, and distinguish the people who are active in the community - and who just likes to play online. Munches are also good to get "face time" - let people know that you are part of the lifestyle, that you are interested, and possibly that you're available (for play, a relationship, friendship, or anything else you have in mind.)



What is a play party? - What should I bring? What should I wear? Who attends? What are the protocols? How do I get invited?

A play party is a party specifically set up for people to engage in BDSM play. At large parties, or those that are public or semi-public, there are usually rules posted about the party- make sure you read them when you enter. At private parties things are usually more casual, but speak to your host or the person who invited you to clear up any rules that may exist.

You should bring anything you might need. It's rude to assume someone else will bring something for you. This includes toys (for tops and bottoms), food, drink, first aid, and aftercare needs.

Some play parties are very casual, while others are very fetish-forward. Ask your host if you're concerned. Play parties are not dating services, so do not come with the intention of someone setting you up with a top or bottom for play for the night. If you are single, still attend - you may meet up with a friend who is looking to play too. Some people will come to play, others will come to be social, and others will come to watch and learn.

Most play parties encourage fetish wear, though few require them. Most fetish nights at bars or clubs do require fetish wear. Consider what you find sexy, what makes you want to play, and what you like seeing on others. Many local shops like Priape, A Little More Interesting, or Little Shop of Pleasures can assist you.

The best way to get invited to parties, is to get out to munches and other events to get to know the organizers/hosts!

For more information, check out our Party FAQ.



What toys do I need or should I have?

The toys that you should have - are the ones that you want to have! There is no rule that says every top must have a flogger or that every bottom should have a set of restraints. However, if there are certain toys you like using, or like to have used on you, you will most likely want to slowly build a collection. Bottoms - it's not just up to the Top to have everything you like! This is especially true for single bottoms!



How do I meet a Master/Mistress/Dominant/Top?

Meeting a Dominant (I'll use the term here, even though you might be looking for a Master, Mistress, Owner, Governess, Daddy, Top, Dominant, or many other things) is much like meeting any other person.

There are personals sites like alt.com and bondage.com which can be moderately useful. Check out the links section for the urls to personals sites. Many people who are online have no immediate plans of taking their fantasies off the computer and into reality. Avoid net speak in emails you might write, "u r hot, wanna chat?" and READ the profiles of those who interest you before emailing.

Many personals sites also have chat rooms, which also can be moderately useful to meet new people. Like profiles, many people in online chat rooms are not yet ready to go offline, and may or may not be what they appear. The best way to make a good impression is to join in the conversation, rather than trolling ("24/male/submissive in Calgary looking for a Domme"). Chat rooms also exist on chat servers like webmaze or yahoo.

There are a few personals through traditional media such as magazines. This is a quickly dwindling practice, however just like reading an online profile, read it carefully before responding. Ensure that there is a good chance that the person you are writing to would want to talk to you.

Likewise, there are telephone personals. These do not tend to attract a large variety of people interested in BDSM, though you may want to try these as well. Again, listen to what the person or people are interested in - and when you respond, note your compatibility.

Whenever responding to personal ads, it's important to note if you and the person (or people) you are responding to are compatible. If you are looking for a Domme - do not email a female submissive with the idea that she SHOULD be a Domme because her picture is attractive to you. Trying to change someone based on YOUR attraction is highly offensive. If someone says that he is only looking for submissives between the ages of 20-30, don't respond if you are in your mid-fourties. People do not usually write profiles without any thought put into them. put that same thought into reading them.

The best way to meet a potential Dominant is in person. If you meet someone online - suggest meeting as soon as possible. It is usually heartbreaking to get to know someone online, only to find out 6 months later when you finally meet in person, that he or she isn't what he or she implied. Go to munches, or other events - they are great ways of meeting people in person, and letting your personality shine through.
Get to know people of ALL orientations. Your submissive friend might introduce you to a Dominant she knows. If you meet a Dominant who you do not connect with - maintain a friendship - he or she might be able to make an introduction in the future to someone more suitable.

Most importantly - know yourself. Know what you are looking for, and what you have to offer. If you want to bottom - be honest about that. If you are looking for sexual activity with play, be honest about that too - it's nothing you want to spring on someone, and if you don't get it - you're likely to be miserable! If you have special skills, let people know them - when they ask. Your special skills might include massage, foot pampering, chauffeuring, cooking, etc.



How do I meet a submissive/slave/bottom?

Like the above topic - meeting a Dominant - there's a lot of similarities in meeting a Submissive. (Again, I'll use this term. you may be looking for a submissive, slave, bottom, pet, girl, boy, student, etc.)

There are online profile sites - though often people online are not yet ready to move offline, and may misrepresent themselves. Be polite in your emails, there is no need to be rude or loose your temper - remember - you are supposed to be in control - and that starts with YOU before you can control someone else!

Meeting people in chat rooms can be equally frustrating because of the lack of commitment to the lifestyle that most people have. However, if you chose to look here, remember that your behavior is being judged - if you offend one submissive, you'd better believe that she'll be telling all of her friends how you treated her badly.

There are a few personals through traditional media such as magazines. This is a quickly dwindling practice, however just like reading an online profile, read it carefully before responding. Ensure that there is a good chance that the person you are writing to would want to talk to you.

Likewise, there are telephone personals. These do not tend to attract a large variety of people interested in BDSM, though you may want to try these as well. Again, listen to what the person or people are interested in - and when you respond, note your compatibility.

Whenever responding to personal ads, it's important to note if you and the person (or people) you are responding to are compatible. If you are looking for a female bottom - do not email a female Top with the idea that she SHOULD be a bottom because her picture is attractive to you. Trying to "change" someone is highly offensive. If someone says that he is only looking for Dominants between the ages of 20-30, don't respond if you are in your mid-fourties. People do not usually write profiles without any thought put into them. put that same thought into reading them.

The best way to meet a potential submissive is in person. If you meet someone online - suggest a public meeting as soon as possible. It is usually heartbreaking to get to know someone online, only to find out 6 months later when you finally meet in person, that he or she isn't what he or she implied. Go to munches, or other events - they are great ways of meeting people in person, and letting your personality shine through.
Get to know people of ALL orientations. Your Dominant friend might introduce you to another submissive she knows. If you meet a submissive who you do not connect with - maintain a friendship - he or she might be able to make an introduction in the future to someone more suitable.

Most importantly - know yourself. Know what you are looking for, and what you have to offer. If you are interested in Topping, and not in being a Dominant - be honest about that. If you want sexual play along with your BDSM play - be up front with that as well - its nothing you should ever spring on someone, and if you don't get it, you're likely to be miserable! Be honest about your level of experience as well. If you are new playing with a certain toy - your submissive can only give INFORMED CONSENT if he or she knows about this.



Vanilla? Submissive? Dominant? What do all of these terms mean?

Many of these terms are negotiable. If you say that you are 'a submissive' - you should be able to describe what this means to you, because someone else may have a different interpretation. These are just some of the interpretations.

Bear - a gay man, usually very 'furry' (lots of body hair) and typically with full figures.

Body modification - changing your body's appearance. This can go anywhere from tattoos, piercing and branding, to implants, or other modifications.

Bottom - someone who enjoys receiving physical play. A bottom may enjoy being flogged, or tied up, but rarely gives up personal power in play. Does not imply an existing relationship.

Bottom-types - a generic term that refers to bottoms, slaves, submissives, and other players "on the bottom"

Boy - a male, or male identified bottom-type

Daddy - a form of topping. Tailored around the idea of a loving, protective, teaching father. This is NOT necessarily a term used by those who are interested in incest or age play. Usually male, though not always.

DM - Dungeon Monitor - no.. it's not just for gamer geeks anymore. the Dungeon Monitor is "god" in a play space, and ensures that everyone is following the rules, obeying safe words, and answers questions to observers.

Dom - a Dominant. Sometimes this term is used gender neutral, however sometimes it is used to refer to a male dominant. Does not imply an existing relationship.

Dominant - someone who enjoys taking some personal power from a specific person. Sometimes called "Dom" for short. Does not imply an existing relationship.

Domme - a female dominant. Like the word "femme" is pronounced "fem", Domme is pronounced "dom" not the occasionally misinterpreted "dom-may". Does not imply an existing relationship.

Dragon's Tongue - a type of whip, with one fall, with a wide base, leading to a tapered end. Usually available in leather or rubber. A fairly painful toy.

Flogger - a form of whip, with many falls. Floggers can range in sensation from stingy to thuddy, and are fairly common toys. They can be found in leather, rubber, horse hair, human hair, rope, chain, and a range of other materials. They are available in select adult stores, online, and elsewhere, and prices range from 30$-several hundred $.

Girl - a female, or female identified bottom-type

Governess - a form of topping. Tailored around the idea of a nanny or a school teacher. Generally a loving role, with firm guidance and teaching for the bottom.

Master - someone who enjoys taking total power from a slave. Generally male or male-identified. Implies a relationship exists with a slave.

Mistress - someone who enjoys taking total power from a slave. Generally female or female-identified. Implies a relationship exists with a slave.

Owner - a form of topping. Someone who 'owns' a pet. Implies an existing relationship with a 'pet'.

Pet - a form of bottoming. Generally takes on the persona of a cherished pet like a cat or a dog, though animal play may or may not be involved.

Play - our term for engaging in BDSM activities.

Polyamory - loving more than one person. Sometimes called "poly". This can be interpreted in a multitude of ways. Someone may consider himself "poly" because he has two submissives who do not usually play together. Someone may consider himself poly because he has a two submissives who are also good friends and care for one another. Someone may consider herself poly because she has two male partners who are also lovers. The "love" part of poly may mean only a deep affection, sexual love, play relationships or other things.

Safe calls - a system of ensuring you have someone else who knows about your play activities, in an attempt to lessen the risk of danger. More information on this is available through the Safe Call Network.

Safe words - set words which indicate a level of comfort to your partner. Tops and bottoms can BOTH use safe words. In scenes where "no" has been negotiated to be meaningless (to increase the excitement of the scene) safe words are in place to say "no". You should negotiate your safe words with your partner, though at certain play parties there may be words already in effect. "Red" is a common word meaning "stop". Likewise "Green" is commonly used to indicate "I'm doing great, please continue".

Scene - this has two meanings. When individuals get together and play, it may be called a scene. If the play is centered around a particular activity, it may be called an "interrogation scene" or a "medical scene". This term is also used to describe the community of people involved in BDSM. For instance "I am involved in the kink scene"

Service Top - A top who enjoys providing play to bottoms, for the bottom's enjoyment. Sometimes used as a derogatory term. A top might have a primary partner where there is a power-exchange (or not) but also offers his or her skills to a bottom who enjoys a specific type of play that they are not otherwise able to engage in.

Slave - someone who enjoys giving up total personal power to a specific person. Assumes a relationship with the person they give up power to.

Submissive - someone who enjoys giving up some personal power to a specific person. Sometimes called "sub" for short. Does not imply an existing relationship.

Swinger - someone who is interested in having a sexual experience outside of his or her primary sexual relationship. Generally couples. Previously described as "wife swapping". Many swing clubs will permit single females however many do not permit single males.

Switch - a person who likes to play more than one role. This may be someone who likes to be both a top, and a submissive, or a dominant and a bottom. etc. These individuals may bottom only for certain people, and generally top for everyone else, or may like to switch roles right in the middle of a scene. Often misunderstood, so communication is important.

Ticket - a single female friend brought with a single male in order to gain entrance to a swing club.

Top - someone who enjoys giving physical play. A top may enjoy flogging or tying someone up, but rarely is interested in taking someone's personal power in play. Does not imply an existing relationship.

Top-types - a generic term that refers to tops, dominants, masters, mistresses, and other players "on the top"

Trolling - talking to someone specifically with the interest of playing with them or having sex. (Versus actually having a conversation.)

Vampire Glove - a leather glove with tiny spikes coming out of the palm. Used primarily as a sensation toy, but can also be used for spanking. Because of the risk of breaking the skin, often used as a 'single person' toy.

Vanilla - Not kinky. Basically our term for people who are not kinky, or environments that are not kink friendly.

Violet Wand - an electrical play toy. This toy gives off a violet coloured light when using regular attachments. The sensation can be anything from a slight buzz to a cutting sting.

Wartenburg Wheel - a sensation toy, very much like a small pizza cutter or sewing transfer tool, but with tiny spikes on the rotating wheel. Also called a Neuro Wheel, you can find them online, through a small amount of adult stores, and at select medical supply stores.



Still can't find your question? Click here!